June (2 of 2): Small Group Discussion Guide
How God Loves Us
In John 5, Jesus approaches a man who hasn’t walked in 38 years—a man who didn’t ask for Him, didn’t recognize Him, and later even throws Him under the bus. Yet Jesus heals him anyway. This story reveals three uncomfortable truths about us: we don’t seek God, we settle for less than what He wants to give, and we often misuse His grace. And yet—Jesus comes anyway. He heals anyway. He loves anyway. Until we let those truths transform our hearts, we will continue to live as though our salvation is fragile and His love is conditional. But it’s not. “If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot disown Himself” (2 Tim 2:13).
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Resources
Surrender to Love: Discovering the Heart of Christian Spirituality by David Brenner
Sermon Video
Sermon Text
John 5:1-18
Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals. 2 Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda[a] and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. 3 Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. [4] [b] 5 One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”
7 “Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.”
8 Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” 9 At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.
The day on which this took place was a Sabbath, 10 and so the Jewish leaders said to the man who had been healed, “It is the Sabbath; the law forbids you to carry your mat.”
11 But he replied, “The man who made me well said to me, ‘Pick up your mat and walk.’ ”
12 So they asked him, “Who is this fellow who told you to pick it up and walk?”
13 The man who was healed had no idea who it was, for Jesus had slipped away into the crowd that was there.
14 Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.” 15 The man went away and told the Jewish leaders that it was Jesus who had made him well.
16 So, because Jesus was doing these things on the Sabbath, the Jewish leaders began to persecute him. 17 In his defense Jesus said to them, “My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I too am working.” 18 For this reason they tried all the more to kill him; not only was he breaking the Sabbath, but he was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal with God.
2 Timothy 2:13
If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot disown himself.
Romans 3:3-4a
What if some were unfaithful? Will their unfaithfulness nullify God’s faithfulness? 4 Not at all!
Romans 3:10-11
There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God.
Micah 3:11
Her leaders judge for a bribe, her priests teach for a price, and her prophets tell fortunes for money. Yet they look for the Lord’s support and say, ‘Is not the Lord among us? No disaster will come upon us.’
Romans 2:4
Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?”
Some of the most resilient people I meet don’t look like they’re struggling at all. They’re highly capable. Driven. Empathetic. They hold it together in public, take care of everyone else, and have mastered the art of “pushing through.” But here’s the thing: Functioning isn’t the same as healing. Adapting to pain isn’t the same as moving beyond it. We learn to cope in ways that help us keep our pain at bay - like staying overly independent, avoiding conflict, overachieving, or putting everyone else’s needs first. These patterns often start as protection. And they work - until they start getting in the way of what we actually need. While you might look fine on the outside, your body might still be bracing. Your relationships might still feel distant. Your joy might still feel like something you have to earn. Healing is what happens when we stop just performing and start tending to the parts of us that never got the chance to feel safe, held, or whole. Just because you’ve learned to function doesn’t mean you’re ok. Coping isn’t the same as healing. - Frank Anderson, MD
"What a shame, therefore, when we turn up at the banquet with our most spiritual parts of self, leaving the other parts that really need healing and transformation hidden in the darkness of our depths. ‘Denying our shadow selves access to the banquet hinders our ongoing conversion, splits our lives dangerously, and renders us vulnerable to what we have denied.’" - David G. Benner, Surrender to Love
Discussion Questions
Have you ever been in a place where you didn’t even know what to ask God for—but He showed up anyway? What was that like? How does that shape how you see Jesus approaching this man?
In what ways have you built a version of God that “works” for you—but might be getting in the way of healing?
Where in your life might Jesus be asking, “Do you want to get well?”
The man wants help into the pool—but Jesus offers something more. What “lesser healing” do you find yourself settling for?
Where are you “performing” or “coping” instead of truly healing? What does the difference between functioning and healing look like in your life right now?
What defenses or coping mechanisms might Jesus be trying to break through in you—not to shame you, but to love you into wholeness?
